Meltha Magazine Online

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2000, No 10, pages 22-23

THE ASSYRIAN WOMAN SPEAKS

Tamara Bet-Tamraz

Why does the Assyrian woman play it so humble?

Have you ever thought about it?

Although she has not always been in the focus and so we even 'know too little of well-known Assyrian women, and moreover we do not have a clue about what role she plays in the family and in the society as well. And to what extent she might be involved in common public pursuits and how deep she could feel in grief and sorrow.

The man always had the power over the woman, According to Hammurabi rules the wife must be humble in her deep respect for her husband's parental family. The Assyrian woman is meant to be brought up from her early days in fullest respect for the man. The wife is totally subjected to her husband, and her life has been just miserable on end. As a rule, Assyrian women had in no way a free choice of occupation. No better did they ever have a chance of going to college or university.

Times are different now though. We are entering into a third millenium, and so it is believed that the woman will be able to cope with all her problems altogether. Of course, life now is a very complicated thing, and everyone has to overcome so many obstacles just to survive and stay as dignified as he was before .

And as it happens she might as well lose some of her national identity in the long run. Anyway the Assyrian woman must find time to meet these challenges and chip in to preserve her national culture in the way she does it while she takes care of her children mostly in the traditions that were handed down to her from bygone days.

Surely the woman is the keeper of the family and home, and if that is the case, the man must respect her in every labor she does in the house or in the office. If God made the woman from the man's rib, it does not mean that we, women, entirely depend on men and if so we are just unable to handle anything on our own.

Why do we not try to hold out together sometimes? And why do we just look on men while they are busy doing something? Anyway men at times are not able to tackle every problem in the way. That is that. Why do we still do it just like keeping at home or working in the house, tending the kids or watching TV? Open your eyes, women, just look around. Well, of course, life is difficult sometimes. The woman is dedicated entirely to her man and children and all. But, alas, she never gets the benefit. Anyway self-sacrifice is very noble, but enough is enough. If only to think that my husband and children need me perky and whole and I must be fit for it, then it is settled.

Or why all we do in this life is just finding faults with one another trying to figure out who is richer and more beautifully dressed and where she goes to spend her holidays, etc. In fact the joy of life, I think, cannot be measured out just with money or cheap thrills. There must be a limit. Life is short and there is no time for fussing indeed.

Every man must have an aim in his life. Like our teacher Marona Arsanis says, "Life without purpose makes no fruits". And here I would like to cite from memory a little handout from Russian popular writer Nikolai Ostrovsky "Life is given only once and it must be lived in the way that it should not be wasted"

In order to live and undertake the man must believe in what he does. The woman can reasonably find her way into any field or area where she might be very useful whether it is her family, professional career or any personal pursuit. The woman must improve herself laboring and enjoying her life.

But why is the Assyrian woman still silent? When will she awake? Why does she not hand down her life experience, language and traditions to her children?

Dear sisters, let us stand together in our own council and let it be a good example of collaboration to our men as well. Unfortunately there is no Assyrian cultural center in Moscow, but we have our Church which is attended on Sundays but is empty on other days. Its building and premises are spacious, and we can turn them into classrooms where Assyrians can study Assyrian and foreign languages, and children can learn drawing, knitting, sawing, photography, computer. Also we can run a library or/and a special course of news casters and narrators for the Assyrian broadcasting company "Kala Atturaya", drama classes and all that. It is vital that Assyrian children must be taught about ethic and social behavior so that they will stay out of drugs and spirits.

I believe that Assyrian women will think about my suggestions and put on initiative after all. And the Church like always will be on our side in all our endeavors.

Assyrian women hundred years ago